Baby Shower Blessings

This past weekend, we had little nugget’s baby shower. Truthfully, this was something I had been looking forward to for months. I was so excited to schedule the party, pick a theme and be ready to share our joy with all our friends and family, like I think many soon to be parents are.

              Then reality sunk in. All of my worlds would be colliding for the first time since I was publicly out as poly. My family, the mechanic’s family, the gardener’s family, and friends from all three of our lives were invited. And, understandably, all of these people have different feelings and reactions to our relationship, and even my publishing of the blog. I don’t think I had considered how the timing of my blog would impact how I felt entering into the baby shower. We were out, and had been out to all friends and family for awhile, but now I was “social media out” and that felt like a whole new kind of vulnerability. Since publishing the blog, I had gotten words of support, words of loving concern, advice, and even a real nasty letter of hate and disgust mailed to me from an anonymous bully.

              So, I was entering the weekend trying to be cautiously optimistic, but as cars started to roll up the driveway at Enrichment Acres, I felt more of a pit in my stomach than excitement. My mind was racing. Did I make the right choice to start this blog? Can I tolerate any awkwardness or uncomfortableness that I perceive today? (as a recovering people pleaser, this is an area of constant growth for me). Will someone say something mean to someone I love? Will anyone even come?

              I am grateful to say, our people came and more than that, they showed up for little nugget in all the ways. My mother is a party planning champion and so naturally stepped in to help me make sure things ran smoothly, from food to décor, to battling the sporadic and dramatic rainstorms. My dad and brother did so much heavy lifting, literally. The gardener’s parents showed up with extra hands to help prep food and with seating options galore. The mechanic’s parents showed up with the party vibe; as they were the first to jump in the pool and welcome friends from all around. And all our friends came with smiles, hugs, and acted as if seeing all three of our families was the most natural thing. And part of me hoped that it was. These are our baby’s people and community, and little nugget will be blessed to be loved so many friends and three adoring families (with room for more maybe). This magical moment reminded me that little nugget will come first to all of us, regardless of how people may feel about polyamory.

              As you begin or continue your poly journey, who is in your corner? Who can you count on to show up for yourself and your partners? What types of situations are you going to find yourself in like this that may make you doubt how others feel? How are you taking care of yourself as you sit in doubt?

              I know that my moments of self-doubt are far from over and I feel blessed to have a had the shower turn out as good as it could (minus the storms). Stay tuned for more as little nugget gets closer to being here and shaking up these three families for good.